Friday, April 29, 2005

haiz... today one of my fren told mi that the guy she likes alot, has found himself a gerfren..is very sad.. i tink is devastating for her... haiz... if i were her... i will too...but if we love that person..many ppl said we shld always wish that person the best..and hope that that person can find his/ her happiness..but is so cliche.but saying it is much easier than doing it rite...haiz...*sobbing* can't imagine one day..if i ...found out..something like that type of senario.. erm..maybe i will not tok bah for days..of maybe.. i will be missing for a few days..haha..or maybe i will be normal....i dunno ...alot of maybes..it all depends...haha..
then my baby cousin...he loves baby talk..haha..so swt... today he went back his home..coming back tis monday nite...miss him alot...

ystdy very tiring.becoz.my baby cousin come le... he is so swt...yet handsome...haha future shuai ge... cubby little sweetie pie... realised to takecare a baby really required alot energy...haf to wake in the middle of the night at 4+ in the early morning to feed a baby.... then changed his diaper... mus pat him to slp..then mus fan him..when he is feeling hot lah... etc..etc..but is fun... playing wif him... hehe...

today went out wif ck, weiyuan, shalene, mingshu, yahui and yaling... actually went to sch lah..haha play badminton... weiyuan can play very well... ck aso..but weiyuan always made us picked the shuttlecock... and thx you all very much,..for the gift..very nice..i like it...thx alot...
then after that we went to sch library... reads book lah..then mi n weiyuan sharing stupid jokes..haha..like weiyuan alot..so farnie..yet so rational sometimes....haha... then slacked there lo...
then after that went to prime mart...gers like mashed potato alot hor..haha..shalene, yaling n yahui and mingshu..all bought the mashed potato..lol..except mi..haha...i'm not a ger...not yet a woman..haha...siao mi...then we took bus 293..to central...orignally want to go subway for our dinner...but..end up chose swedsen...shared banana split wif yaling...then the rest chose baked rice.... except ck..who chose fish and chips wif a cups of tata...haha the..tata king...
then on the way back..on the bus chat wif yahui...haha realised that she really 4gotten sean's b'day on that day..but she rem it on the 22 of april and the day after it...but so suay forgotten on the actual day..but anyway...if sean u r reading this..haha... she didn 4get it totally..she is jus too busy wif her work... hope u dun mind..haha
then came back... do some reading... then hor......... i got a big bad news ...frm my fren...haiz... i won't consider it is a breakup.. since both of them going to wait for each other...haiz...it is sad...but i think let look at the +ve side.... at least they going to wait for each other..but is torturous..but real love waits rite..i believe u can do it de.. jiayou... is better than one-sided waiting... one sided..the other party will nv noe...haiz
tml my baby cousin coming le... so anxious..

sometimes...i hope i'm a guy and he is a ger..haha..and i can sing this song by bon jovi...the title is i'll be there for u...


I guess this time
you're really leaving
I heard your suitcase say goodbye
And as my broken heart lies bleeding
You say true love in suicide

You say you're cried a thousand rivers
And now you're swimming for the shore
You left me drowning in my tears
And you won't save me anymore

Now i'm praying to god you'll give me one more chance, girl

I'll be there for you
These five words i swear to you
When you breathe i want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you

I'd live and i'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you

know you know we're had some good times
How they have their own hiding place
I can promise you tomorrow
But i can't buy back yesterday
And baby you know my hands are dirty
But i wanted to be your valentine

so nice...

waiting for you.......

last friday afternoon...i brought my bro to marrybrown..actually he asked to go one lah... he wanted to try ....so we had our lunch there.. and after our lunch... he wanted to takeaway garlic breads...win le lo..but we waited quite long for the garlic breads...until that kind cashier his name is eugene..hehe actually served us wif free drinks while waiting ..he quite handsome though...hehe..
then sat ... morning..helped my ah ma to pack her room... becoz...my baby cousin coming to stay wif us soon...yeah yea...finally got baby to dote le... he is so cute.. cubby ....he is so sweeeeeeeeeeeet... so i decide to spend more time wif him ..... he is coming tis thurs... can't wait le..haha
then today.. afternoon my mum and i was cooking... like hell... haha..so many things to do...coz later in the evening we..i mean my family n i ..decide to haf our dinner in pasir ris park...haha... so abt 5+...we set off wif my doggie..bengi..and all thoes food... that park hor so many many mosquitos ar... buaytahan... anyway we found a bench there... and ate our dinner there...then we went to the maze... abit sian...the maze not exciting at all... then my bengi.. he abit hao sei... so attracted by another dog...haha... then played badminton wif my family... although abit tiring..but very fun.. so we decide nxt weekend .... going to haf our dinner again at the outdoor...most probably changi beach... haha...

today went out wif shihui..and amelia at 10am ..haha.. then we went to tm watch the morning show..i was very sleepy until the movie start...before the show starts..there is an ad on a new movie..by ashton kutcher..if i didn rem wrong the title is "alot of love"... it shld be a nice movie...since is kinda farnie.. but i tink is love comedy movie...anyway back to the movie starred by VIN diesel.that i was watching... The Pacifier... the show was funny.. and vin diesel...is so funny in the movie.. haha..he is so muscular...hehe.. he is so charming...haha...think i'm crazy over him..he is so macho and yet bery cute in the movie... it will be gd to haf a boyfriend like tis....haha... anyway.. after that show.. we from Tm ..then walked to Century square but jus couldn't decide wat to eat for our lunch... end up... we chose subway... which is at the other side..near telepark or is it telepark..haha.. the turkey and cheese is nice..darn nice..
then we went to ame's place...her hse very spacious... very neat..jus like shihui's.. then they watched their favourite anime...while i surf the net..hehe searching for the pacifier website..hehe..so nice.. got vin diesel's pic.. and games... while ame went to search for badminton rackets... at 3p.m..we proceed to the tampines sport hall..... haha..then i got to see shihui's bull run...haha... so farnie lo... then poor ame..was bullied by us..haha..made her keep playing.. and that silly shihui ar... i was daydreaming..then she tot i was watching guyz....haha.. i'm not lo..haha..now i'm oni attracted to guy that look vin diesel..haha..i'm crazy..haha...dun care mi...
then played and played lo... the guyz beside our court..so funnie.. esp when they hit their shuttlecock into our court... and they were like so shocked dun dare to pick their shuttlecock..hahaha..then we went to bathe ...then we took photo in the toilet..haha...then went back to ame's place awhile to take foto..haha..and her mum is so cute.. n nice lady...and she loves wang ren fu..alot.... keep telling us...haha.. nice family...
ald 3 day le...when are u all coming back? miss you guyz..

haiz.. i really dunno wat to say to u, sh...i'm really inexperience in all this BGR stuff.....but dun worry..i will be there to listen to u..though i can't gif u gd advice...at most i can oni joke wif u oni . haiz... realised to look for someone u love and secretly in love wif him is much betta then havin him wif u and maintaining a love relationship with that person which is more diffcult.. when u love that person more than he do...
ming, ck , hui, weiyuan, sharky... 2nd day le..u all coming back soon...yea.... dunno whether they got brin the air frm genting back to mi anot..haha....if not i'm gotta hood their buttocks...haha...jus kiddin...
another thing todAY...got sms frm my fren...hhaha..he told mi wt darn muscular..haha..and they actually went gym together with other frenz lah...... and he is now his fren...and wt knew alot ppl... wat a small world... or maybe he is jus too nice.. too many frenz le...meaning......haiya...why shld i care so much...
back to u ..shihui.. erm... there is nth much we outsider can do... and i tink u cannot do anythin..u r tired ..maybe take a break ... and i noe u tried ur best... i noe u dun wan to let go...it is hard... real damn hard.... perhaps... in fact ....u nv think of letting go..but trying to change and make the relationship a betta one... but things may not be coming to an end bah... perhaps he is jus bad mood..u noe him lah..he is crazy sometimes...or maybe 2 of u are perfectionists... i dunno... perhaps 2 of u think that in a relationship shldn be so much arguments n problems that are unsolved... i dunno wat happen between 2 of u... even though there is a saying that oni outsiders can see the picture clearly... in ur case...oni 2 of u see it clearly...nobody will noe wat is he thinkin..and he dun wan to share wif u. but frm wat i can see.. i noe u love him more than he do... but maybe he loves u too... maybe he got other problems.... which u are not aware of.... and to be honest...i still think messenging is not a gd way to communicate n solve a problem....i noe that guy doesn't wan to tok it thru the phone..maybe u shld try to look at other mode... i can't think of any right now though...
life is so unpredictable... haiz....
life is

today, ck, ming, wei, hui, n sharky...they went to genting le.. hopefully they haf fun there...n i went to sch instead..sian.. start to miss them now.. haha.. see msn all of them missing... nvm..they coming back soon... erm.. wat a small world rite... nv noe he got so many frenz.. haha..soon he will be become his fren bah..lol..y i say so? becoz tml they going gym together...wat a small world..shld wat a small tp..haha.. dun care le...y shld i tink of him..give up mich bong...

today went out wif my family to changi beach... before that we went to the new jetty..very new..haha.. erm... but i still prefer the old one... maybe becoz the old one reminds mi of the adventure camp... stars cruise...haha.. it was fun...
i love beach.....the breeze.. the wind... it is so cool...."threw away" all the stupid thoughts...dun wan to think abt it anymore... no more crying le..

crying for the past few nites... how to stop it??? haix.... y do i love him so much.... is like wat the hell am i doing... i shld have moved on long ago...... wat is the problem wif mi????? i really wan to move on.. but why do i still wan to cling on tis thing.... hate myself alot lah.. stupid mi..... hope i can erase everything on my mind... then can start anew...... but it is jus hope when i dun even wan to move on..... haiz.........foolish, i'm so foolish....... biggest fool....

today, morning spent abt 5 hrs in sch..for IG meetings.... planning the whole year plan... so tired to be in main com... and i tink i dun cut out to be a secretary... dun care le lah..dying soon..haha...today wan to dash across the road without looking at the traffic.....crazy mi.. but i stop myself on time... sometimes, tink too much aso not a gd thing..but too simple-minded will be easily cheated...but anyway.. i dun care le...but i wan to care.... haiz.....contradicting.... can u jus pls tell how are u? where r u ? wat are u doing? i wan to noe........

i hate myself... i tink i shld f***** off..... idiotic person... bloody idiot ever...

today went to meet sharky,ming, ck n kelvin for badminton session.... it was fun... especially wif kelvin's big big actions...haha..quite surprised he went to gym alone.. tot that he will be accompanied by someone esle... but anyway.... kelvin hits very high balls... but... aso falls very easily... i tink ck's story can make into drama... realised ppl fall in love very easily...even when they are attached wif someone esle...it is like so hard to find true love nowadays.... so sad to say... but is quite true... and to find someone who will reciporcate ur love is even diffcult....
after the badminton session, we went to bookshop... sharky went to get her card for her future mother-in-laws...while i bought chinese calligraphy stuffs...it's been a long time i haben practise my calligraphy le..... then at abt 3 plus..we went to mensa to have our...er....for mingshu is breakfast..then for mi is like lunch + dinner...shalene aso......then ck didn eat..becoz he ate his long ago...then kelvin went to design to buy his food...haha... very hardworking chap...
then ming n kel went to library lst...then the rest went to library... anyway... then we slacked there abt 1 hour..b4... ck left lst...to go home for his dinner...then shalene, ming, kelvin and mi stayed in the library.. to watch bridget jones' diary......it is darn farnie... really... but we didn get to finish the movie..coz the library closed at 7pm.... watching movie in the library... is smth like a taboo for mi...haha... why...becoz... of .... i rem. the yr 1 2nd sem. we went to watch princess diary... wif him, ros n jessly..if i didn rem wrongly..jess n him left early...leavin mi n ros watchin that show...then he came back again... n ros 's turn to leave for her class... leaving 2 of us there watching movie...we finished the whole show... n we walked back together..... haiz...n the rest is history..... ok... i dun wan to say le... crying le........haiz........ i hate it..how come i'm toking abt tis... nvm... bridget jones really very nice...i wan to watch it...

hehe...i'm so happy..finally can change my blogskin by myself... even though ... i still dunno how to fix my tagboard... so frenx..sorry ar..give mi sometimes to figure out...
ok today abit.. sian... anyway... i tink the nxt lig meetings will be very long...now start to hate to write minutes..but when u finished typing a minutes... u will feel like u have accomplished something and amazed abt it...silly mi..
.but realised secretary is very impt in a meeting... mus copy everything dwn during a meeting... if not the meeting is wasted...haha....i said until secretary like very impt liddat..hehe crap mi..i tink during lecture, i'm not even so hardworking to copy dwn everything the lecturer say....
anyway jus now chatting wif my pexin darling...haha...she is ever so fun-loving... haha... then i went to see my frenster a/c, shalene wrote a new testi for mi.....thx shalene.. i'm happy to haf a fren like u too..cute n pretty...
and ya..shihui..paiseh..if u are reading tis.. last nite was busy wif my minutes stuff...so no time to call u... but..i will contact u as soon as possible..haha..estimate tis friday nitez...
ok...i'm very sad...but i'm not going to say anything le.... say le aso liddat.. he will nv noe.. nv ever noe.....

jus now i was browsing my frenster account bulletin board... then i read abt tis story ..the title of the story is "i wAntEd tO tEll mY lOvE oNe hOw mUcH i lOvE hiM!"

it goes like tis....
Daniel and Jasmine are sitting alone inthepark, one night.
Daniel:I guess we are the left overs in thisworld
Jasmine:I think so, all of my friends haveboyfriends and we are the only 2 persons leftinthis world without any special person in ourlife
Daniel:Yup I don't know what to do
Jasmine:I know! We'll play a game
Daniel:What game?
Jasmine:i'll be your girlfriend for 30 days andyou will be my boyfriend
Daniel:That's a great plan in fact i don't havenothing to do much this following week...

DAY 1:They watch their first movie and they werebothtouchedby a romantic film
DAY 4:They went to the beach and had a picnic...Daniel and Jasmine have their quality timetogether
DAY 12:Daniel invited Jasmine to a circus and theyrideon a Horror House ride. Jasmine wasscared andshe thought she touched Daniel's hand butshe touchedsomeone else's hand instead and they bothlaughed.
DAY 15:They saw a fortune teller down the road andthey asked for their future advice and thefortuneteller said: "My darlings, Please don't wastethe timeof your life...SPend the rest of your timetogetherhappily" Then tears flow out from the teller's
DAY 20:Jasmine invited Daniel to go to the hill andtheysaw a meteor...Jasmine mumbledsomething
DAY 28:They sat on the bus and because of a bumbyroad Jasmine gave her first kiss to Daniel byaccidentDAY 29:11:37pmJasmine and Daniel sat in the park wheretheyfirst decided to play this game...
Daniel:I'm tired Jasmine...Do you want anything todrink? I'll buy you one.. I'll just go down theroad
Jasmine:Apple Juice that's all
Daniel:Wait for me.20mins later;
a stranger approached
Jasmine
Stranger:Are you a friend of Daniel?
Jasmine:Why yes? What happened?
Stranger:A reckless drunken driver ran overdaniel and he is critical in the hospital

11:57pmThe doctor came out of the emergency roomand he handed out an apple juice and a letter
Doctor:We found this in daniel's pocket
Jasmine reads the letter and it says:Jasmine, This past few days, i realized youarea really cute girl and i am really falling foryou..Your cherished smile your everything whenwe playedthis game; before this game would end. Iwouldlike you to be my girlfriend for the rest of mylife. I love you Jasmine.
Jasmine crumples the paper and shouted:"Daniel ! i don't want you to die. I loveyou, Remember that night when we saw ameteor, I mumbled something; I mumbledthat I wish we would be together forever andneverend this game. Please don't leave meDaniel. Ilove you! You cannot do this to me"
Then the clock strikes 12
Daniel's heart stoped pumping
THEN IT WAS THE 30TH DAY;

the moral of the story....
Always love your loved ones and show themhow you feel before it is too late...You willneverknow when they will be gone from yourembrace...Ifyou were given a time to bestow petals ofeverlasting compassion and love to yourloved ones?Today is the day, love them while they are stillhere.

i tink the story ended so sadly..death.. if only they can tell each other their own feelings... but one thing they at least were together b4... as the chinese saying goes.. bu zai hu tian zhang di jiu..zi zai hu chen jin yong you...

finally got to see my results online... ok lo... quite fine wif it..since every sem result is abt the same..haha.. sorry frenz.. i dun tink i can go to genting.. enjoy urself k..

ok..another boring day.. erm...jus i was folding my paper cranes...alot of memories came into my mind... secondary to poly..to now... then i rem my lst hp model was nokia 3210 ...haha..big, long heavy bulky..haha..then i rem i was the one whu keep sms to my friends who have their own hp...haha..becoz my smSs was free of charge that time when u used m1 sim card ...i rem was i was sec 3 then..haha.. then i rem my lst phyics teacher was mr. farhan..if i didn rem wrongly his name... and if i didn rem wrongly..he was considered the most handsome and charming male teacher at that time bah.haha.. and at that time he jus graduated frm his jc and very young somemore.. 19 yr-old.... waiting for his ns.. so he came n taught us phyics...haha.. to be honestly..i dun reALLy understand wat he teach that time ..haha..so my phyics sux all the way..haha..until sec 4... ..and aso my friend.huihsian.haha..she was crazy over him..hahha..shld be most gers crazy over..go gaga over him..but i didn lah..at lst i tink he very shuai but after that he like abit sloggy....dun believe mi rite.... haha..and when he left our sch.. it was like students esp female students..got him alot presents..haha....
then on the other hand, our chemistry relief teacher, miss zarlin..haha.. actually mr farhan n zarlin came frm the same jc lah..they were ex-classmates... haha.. while the gers go gaga over mr farhan.. then guyz in our sch..but not all i mean lah.. go gaga over miss zarlin... haha.. ...miss zarlin... she got great figures..honestly.. i tink when she lst step in our class...u noe..everyone is like looking at her...erhmm....that upper part lah.. is like so wei da... haha... if u noe wat i mean lah.. so in conclusion gers will pay special attention during physic class..then guyz will pay extra attention during chemistry lesson...damn farnie de..haha.. then end up..there was a rumor that mr farhan n miss zarlin stead..haha..
so fun during secondary sch days... alot alot of memories...gd or bad ... but all are precious lah...
then came to poly.. totally new environment.. then networking became very impt... the lst person i got to noe in poly shld be annabelle...haha.. then daniel..then yaling... slowly as time passes ... noe everyone in the class...so fun... the very lst sem in tp was fun... the class was cohesive..n close....not forgeting during the lt.. haha.. i always look at jay lookalike- clifford..haha.perhaps he is the centre of attraction of our lt bah..haha. that time tot i like him very much... but it was infatuation... hahaha then came yr1 sem 2... got to noe more ppl... badminton became one of my interest....haha.. practise badminton at home very hard... sem 2 more terrible times.. haha... feeling went up n dwn... high n low... realised wat is loving someone abt... realised how i really felt when i fall in love wif someone ..the actual feeling... haha... is terrible haiz..once u are trapped in the feeling.. is hard to leave the trap... for mi is liddat ...perhaps..stubborn bah....haha... then got to noe kokyee lah..very crap guy..haha..
then yr 2 sem1..same class as kokyee again....then became my bro...haha.. got a new nick..bpw...
haha..... then yr 2 sem2 ...yahui same klass wif mi again..haha... noe more ppl thru her... like johnson lah... terence lah...peixin lah... n sean lah n junjie lah...n so qiao de..mrs aisha was my comskill tutor again...haha... yr 2 sem 2 very short bah... damn short...haha...see how time flies... today...i blog so long ar..haha..long winded cha bo.................
how are u today? hopefully u have fun today...

i tink i said something very stupid to yaling...
i said i wan to be a vampire.. so that can live forever...eternity..
becoz i will wait for him.. tis life, next life or even nxt nxt life....wait until the day he is mine..
yaling said it is jus a growing phrase...agree wif her.. but for the time being.. i will wait....haha..
nv noe i'm so paitent....crazy mi...

Love knows no reasons, love knows no lies. Love defies all reasons, love has no eyes. But love is not blind, love sees but doesn't mind. ~ by Author unknown ~


Sometimes we let affection, go unspoken,
Sometimes we let our love go unexpressed,
Sometimes we can't find words to tell our feelings,
Especially towards those we love the best.
by Author unknown


i tink all thoes quotes are very meaningful.. haiz.. today, i'm bored again.. then when i'm bored..i will start to tink stupid stuffs..sometimes i wish my brain has gone missing... sometimes i wish u can be normal again.. hope u noe i'm refering to u.....
i dunno wat is love ...i'm lousy....nv been in a relationship b4...
alot of ppl do not wan love someone..becoz they are afraid that their love would not be reciporcated.. haiz...but love is to give without expecting any returns... so contradicting....
haiz..guess i'm going to disappear too....

ystdy nite, watched the show ' interview wif the vampire' starred by tom cruise and brad pitt..omg they were both so shuai...their vampire looks were so...attractive.. i tink brad is really damn shuai lo.... wah...if i see him real life ..i will faint man... haha.. louis de pointe du lac... is his vampire name... ..charming..haha..... but i tink is a sad show... a very sad show.... i'm going to get the vcd n dvd...hehe...
ok... lastly... i wan to announce something... i dun love water anymore... hopefully...hehe.. haiya.. i'm going to look for my louis vampire...haha..crazi ger...

today...my body ache... haha.. lousy mi.. ystdy spent almost the whole day wif yaling, jiaxian, mingshu, yahui, sharky, weiyuan my dear n lastly..ck.. from morning 9am to at nite 9pm..haha... very fun... haha... zhong ji min mah..is an interesting game..haha...but dunno when can we play it again le..since tis is like our last holiday..hopefully we can have another round again....ystdy was fun..keep laughing lo...but one thing very sad.. it was raining ystdy at sentosa...no sun..so sad...i wan to be more tanned.... with them around , my life seemed better..haha..at least can laugh more...and i tink the sakea at sentosa is a gd place to eat...haha...no ppl de..so no need to queue...and basically..to open the sakea door, jus press the button beside the door..haha.. dun wait for the sensor...becoz no sensor.. ck rem..haha.. we ate alot there.. haha...mochi very nice...but i still prefer my tako yaki though is kinda small....guyz next time we eat there k....
lstly..... jus to clarify lah..i dun smoke..haha... i drink beer oni.....smoking is bad..since i now persuading one of my fren dun smoke....it is even impt that i dun smoke... haha.. must show gd example.. i oni how to smoke a ham..haha..
hopefully u all enjoyed ur ice cream session today... sorry guyz i jus can't make it...
secondly...realised something ystdy during the zhong ji min mah game... i ald 4get water ald...everything is over... so it is a gd news..haha.. life goes on as normal.. hopefully.. my psychologist can aso get over wif everything... jiayou k...if u reading tis. hope u noe i'm refering to u.... it is hard..but i tink u can de....
thirdly............. HappY AprIL FooL to everyone out there.......... :P