{prologue}

preferred to be called: MichB
years of existence: 19
preoccupied with: eating, sleeping, cooking , throbbing, sighing, reading, flying, star-gazing

*loves:
{chocolate
{nature
{fireflies
{him
{waterfalls
{stars

*loathes:
{plastics
{back-biters
{pests
{back aches

{wishlist}

ipod
sony erisson w900
his love
Precious thoughts figurine
happiness

{fellows}

cheryl}
emily}
Shihui}
yahui}
weiren}
chee wee}
fira}
sulin}
daniel}

{express}
N {Shoutbox}


 
{credits}

 
Afianne
Blogskins.com
Kakii.com
Miss M
44suburbia
Foto Decadent

 
{bygone}

October 2004[x] November 2004[x] December 2004[x] January 2005[x] February 2005[x] March 2005[x] April 2005[x] May 2005[x] June 2005[x] July 2005[x] August 2005[x] September 2005[x] October 2005[x] December 2005[x] January 2006[x] February 2006[x] March 2006[x] April 2006[x] May 2006[x] June 2006[x] July 2006[x] August 2006[x] September 2006[x] October 2006[x] November 2006[x] December 2006[x] January 2007[x] February 2007[x] March 2007[x] April 2007[x] May 2007[x] August 2007[x]

































Friday, October 14, 2005

today same thing lo.. after work.. went up wif mao to the penthouse party...very nice view there...can see to the sea..and sunset...and is very high class there... my lst time to a penthouse... it will be a nice place to get engage...haha... jus thinking...
actually afternoon beside doing my research stuff... i was tinking smth esle... tinking of a person...wondering how is he...i wish i can tok to him..but i doubt so....and tinking y do all my guy frenz treat me like a guy.. do i really look like a guy? doesn't that mean... ok i admit i'm clumsy.. rough.. erm...not a ladylike..but then y... haiz... those guyz i liked, always treat me like a guy... haiz... actually is a very sad thing... my feeling was nv appreciated... in fact they will tink i will recover frm the rejection becoz i'm big... y other gers can be sad when they are rejected... while me... i'm not allow to be sad.... have to be so cheerful... have to be happy... i have to laugh when i'm rsad...
many ppl told me.. the time is not rite yet... the one will find me one day... i hope so... haha..hoping that for 18 yrs ald... haha... i'm not desperate for a bf... is jus that i hope someone will care for me , someone there for me when i'm sad... dun have to cry alone in the middle of the nite... i'm strong phyiscally but mentally i'm weak.. i have been lying for 18 yrs... lying to myself.... deep down inside me...
yes...i'm forunate.. i have alot of gd frenz... nice ppl..caring frenz...great personality....but they have their own things to do... i got a caring family... but i'm selfish... i'm idiotic... i dun wan to be alone to face everything...yes u may think i'm useless...i agreed with that...but i'm useless...
i jus merely need a shoulder to be there for me...
y do i like weiting.. becoz he treats me like a ger... haha.. but in fact he treats everyone liddat.. that was the only time.. i felt that i was treated like a ger... and becoz of my own misunderstanding...i lost a gd fren... a frenship... something that i will nv forget.... coz is still hurts....
for so many years, in my family... in sch.... i tink i'm like a guy... haiz..maybe i really shld go for a sex change
haha... i believe... after typing for so many things... i believe nobody reads it bah... except for 2 person bah...maybe that 2 person dun even have time to bother to read my blog.... i wrote it out not becoz i wan to get attention...but i jus need to say it out...hahaha...i'm going to burst...if u get to read, count urself lucki if u can read tis(jus kiddin lah no offence)...haha..coz not everyone gets to noe how i feel...hee...

11:16 PM;

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